Tuesday, September 29, 2009

Free


There is much to celebrate today...

In the midst of kids being sick...

In the midst of life being overwhelming...

There is a God who is not overwhelmed.

And a love that is not shaken by checklists and chores.

There is a place that I can hide away

And be.

A place that I can forget about the stuff

To sit at the feet and listen

To the One.

For only one thing is needed.

And I would like to choose the better.

I would like for it to not be taken from me.

I'd like to be like Mary today.

So easily it can be taken.

But not today.

Not now.

Maybe today, I could choose freedom

I could choose

To rest.

Seem simple?

Not for me.

Seem impossible?

Yes.

Thankfully, nothing is impossible

With God.

Thursday, September 24, 2009

Mums were Nestled all Snug in their Beds...

There are few things that I love more than celebrating. We've even changed our business phrase to "celebrating everyday life" rather than "creating for everyday life". It just seems to fit a little bit better.

So, to celebrate the start of Fall,
this past week I bought these beautiful mums,
and nestled them all snug in their beds.


I begged my hubs to go up to the attic and get down my harvest wreath that still smells wonderful with the eucalyptus that has been in there for 2 years


Filled some other fun jars with lots of Autumntime.

I changed out my seascape candle setting to be more earthy
(also this makes a great place for the kids to put as many acorns
as they want in there without them getting all over my house!)

And made my hubby another pot of vegetable soup.

They're not big things...just everyday ways to celebrate this gift called Fall that God gives us every year. What things do you like doing to welcome Autumn? I know I'm not the only one who likes to party! ;)

Monday, September 21, 2009

Will You Ever Turn

I had a wonderful weekend at the beach with a group of beautiful girls. A few of us that live in our neighborhood took them down to talk about real stuff. Relationships, sex, shame, forgiveness, redemption, breaking free from cycles of sin, were a few of the topics we discussed.
These are girls that have never seen the beach before, girls that don't know how precious they are. Girls that have suffered much more than I could ever imagine, girls that have struggled to fight to even remain alive.

As I dropped the girls off, and drove home, I saw two of our other precious girls, who are were walking down a dark street. Walking with two boys that had the look that they were up to nothing good. I turned around and went back. Even though it was late, even though it was dark, because I hoped so much that they would get in the car. That they would let me take them home. They said no, as they stayed in the shadows, and barely said anything at all.


Will you ever turn back

from wandering down that dark street,

covering your face

as one trying to hide.


Will you ever look back

and see all who love you

All who want you

To have a better life

Than the one you think you deserve.


As I see you walking

I think you're beautiful,

But you won't even look me

In the eye.


Will you ever turn back

And see how much He loves you

How much He holds you

In the palm of His hand.


He'll never let you go,

No matter how you run,

No matter where you hide,

He holds you fast,

He holds you sure,

And though you won't turn,

Neither will He.

He'll never turn back

From loving you.

Friday, September 11, 2009

Set on Pilgrimage

I have this battle I fight every day. Well, several, if you really want to know the truth. But lately, the most common battle is an ugly five letter word. Guilt.

It causes me to do things like try to explain why I haven't done something a certain way, or to apologize for not doing something I think I should have. I end up apologizing to my husband, my children, my friends, my God.

It makes me feel like I've messed up before I've even begun.

It nags me to the point of giving up, but I don't because the threat of failure is too great.

The tricky thing about it all, is that it doesn't seem like guilt. It seems like truth and conviction. It spurs me on to do it right, and to do it better. However, therein, lies the defeat.

The other day, feeling weary from this familiar battle, I came across this...or rather, I was led to this...

"Blessed are those whose strength is in you,
who have set their hearts on pilgrimage.
As they pass through the Valley of Baca,
they make it a place of springs;
the autumn rains also cover it with pools.
They go from strength to strength,
til each appears before God in Zion."

I immediately breathed in the comfort and peace He was longing to give me.

Then I looked up "Baca". The Valley of Baca was never an actual Valley, however the word means weeping. I don't know about you, but I've seen many a Valley of Baca. And I honestly think that much of my striving is an attempt to avoid ever having to enter another one.

But, oh, to have those springs. To have those beautiful autumn rains cover me with pools of strength. I could just sit in them forever, like a child swimming in a cool pool on the hottest day of summer, not wanting to get out, even when their lips are blue and their fingers are all shriveled up. But so often, I forsake the pool, for a cheap attempt to get their on my own.

We are each on this journey, and even though many days my heart is set on pilgrimage, sometimes it's strength is in me, not in Him. I'm so thankful that he reminds me that it is not up to me to be strong enough, and not for me to do it right or do it better. It is up to Him, to live through me, to be my strength and to lead me even through the Valleys of Baca. To go from "strength to strength" till I appear before God, full of His own glorious strength, and nothing left of me.


Monday, September 07, 2009

Splashing Around




The days have actually felt longer recently. I know they're actually getting shorter, but at our house they don't feel as filled as they used to. I think part of it is just that I miss her being home, or the hours until I see her don't feel like they pass quickly enough.

On the other hand, I have really loved being able to spend such good time with my little man. Oh my gosh, I don't think I've ever seen such a cute boy. And oh, how he makes me laugh!! He is so funny. I truly cherish his sweet tender spirit and ambition towards life.

Today was his first day of preschool. I tell you what, though...after having to dive into Kindergarten, taking him to preschool felt like a puddle to splash around in, rather than an ocean to cross!

He walked in, and all I saw was the back of his head. I stood there for a few seconds waiting for him to turn around, and when he didn't, I quietly slipped into the hall, but felt a tad bit guilty that I hadn't said good-bye. I was thinking what if he thinks I just left him...without even saying good-bye! Clearly you can see that I'm the one in need of help!

Later as I talked to my hubby I told him how Ash had gone in, without one last hug, or one more look, or even a "I love you! I'll be back soon!" He very calmly said, "That's because he already knows it."

all ready for preschool

Tuesday, September 01, 2009

Have A Seat


Even though I've been on the go almost constantly this past week, I've been thinking a lot about sitting. Watchman Nee has been reminding me of so many foundational, yet profound truths this week. I picked up Sit, Walk, Stand the other day, and I can't tell you how glad I am to be reminded to sit.

See, like most Christians, I have made the mistake of trying to "walk in order to be able to sit. Our natural reason says, 'If we do not walk, how can we ever reach the goal? What can we attain without effort? How can we ever get anywhere if we do not move?"

Did you hear what says that? Our natural reason! That's what has me bent over backwards every day trying to accomplish something that has already been finished. Mr. Nee goes on to say,

"If at the outset we try to do anything, we get nothing; if we seek to attain something, we miss EVERYTHING. For Christianity begins not with a big DO, but with a big DONE."

How many times have you tried to "do" your spiritual life instead of realizing that Christ has already done everything there needs to be done. I wrestle every day to let God have control, and to force myself to sit in Him. Sometimes I feel like He has to tie me to the chair just to get me to "sit".

"In walking or standing we expend a great deal of energy, but when we are seated we relax at once, because the strain no longer falls upon our muscles and nerves but upon something outside of ourselves. So also in the spiritual realm, to sit down is simply to rest our whole weight - our load, ourselves, our future, EVERYTHING - upon the Lord. We let him bear the responsibility and cease to carry it ourselves.

"Sitting is an attitude of rest. Something has been finished, work stops, and we sit. It is paradoxical, but true, that we only advance in the Christian life as we learn first of all to sit down."

I'm great at walking, but these days, I'm relearning how to have a seat. Won't you pull up a chair with me?