Thursday, July 30, 2009

Catching Up and Falling Behind

I'm either getting slower, or just taking longer to get the job done.   Lately, it feels like I'm moving at a snail's pace to catch up.    Or maybe, just maybe, I'm enjoying more of the process, instead of just the finished product.   Either way, it's Thursday, and I just now feel like I'm caught up from getting back from vacation.    It was so much fun, and it definitely could have been longer!       

I remember the summer that my sister's middle boy was 2, and seeing him sleep on her chest at the beach.   I thought that it was the sweetest picture of rest.   He was totally content to be all sandy, but snuggled up next to Mommy, sleeping peacefully.    And that was the last summer that it happened.   By the next year he was chasing after everyone and everything as fast as he could.    So when Asher fell asleep on me on the first day of our trip, and I couldn't help but get Randy to get a picture.    Because most days he naps in his bed, and because he probably won't be napping much longer, and because it may not ever happen again.   As I held him for those minutes, I treasured the gift.    His sweet little face, sandy from playing, and warm from the sun.  His tiny body so worn out that even the short walk back from the beach was too much for him to handle.   His paci, even though he still has it, being a sign that he's still my baby.   It was probably one of my most precious times of the week.


Here are few other action shots from our trip...

I think it's proof that we had a great time, when my 2 year old was watching me upload the pictures he kept saying, "Mommy, I want go there again!"    

On another note, can you believe it's almost AUGUST!!!   Even thinking that makes me almost have a panic attack!     In the rush to get caught up, I feel the tug of all there is to still to do.  It feels like I'll never really get caught up, because there is always something waiting to make me fall behind.     To finally find that falling behind is inevitable, and that to "catch up" is only an illusion, is definitely making it hard to be me these days.    But in that process, there is joy to be found.    That's what I want to find...not just accomplishment.   But to truly to find joy in the midst of chaos, and rest in the midst of life.   

Now I just need to go apologize to my children for telling them not to bother me while I was posting about how precious they are to me.

1 comment:

Whitney Hannam said...

OMG-Asher looks like such a big boy sitting on the bench with his sis and! Love the curlers as well...glad ya'll had such a fun time!