Let Down the Hands

As I walk through the war zone I call "home" I know I need a rest. I feel the need to sit and be still, but, like most days, I tend to not give into that need. I tend to see stopping or being still as being weak. Like I'm not being strong enough or good enough to get everything done. Or I give into the thought that tells me that I should be still later. But later never comes.

Every day, I make my kids take a rest. Even if they don't sleep, they have to stay on their bed (or sometimes on the couch) and have some time and space to just be still. I know that a rest is what they need. I see them yawning and rubbing their eyes, and I know. They just need to be still and rest. It seems like I would take my own rule to heart, but usually, I just have too much to do to take the time to be still.

Last week I learned that the Hebrew meaning for the word "still" is to "let down the hands". I've always known that it was not my nature to be still. As long as I can remember, I've always been busy...or the more positive word to use would be "involved" or "active". But it really just is being busy. Going here or there, doing things with this group or that group. I was always actively involved in school, dance, theater, church, social events, etc. etc. And today, is just the same. Just because I'm older doesn't mean that I've stopped running here and there. It just becomes more difficult to "let my hands down". Not only are there things to be involved in, there are people to take care of! Not only is it just dressing myself, and cleaning my room before I run out to do do do....now it's dressing myself and my kids, feeding my family, cleaning my house, working in the yard, and as you know...the list goes on. So, how much harder is it now to let my hands down??

"Be still and know that I am God" it is not something that God says we maybe should do every once in a while. It's not something He suggests is a good idea for some of us. He is saying it to us all. "Be still...Be still and know that I am God." "Let your hands down". He's begging us, "Take a minute and know that I am God. Know that I have it all in my hands. Know that it will be ok if you play with your kids at the park instead of doing laundry. It will be alright if you study my word instead of tackling the house right now. I am God, and I love you. And me telling you to let down your hands is for your best."

I don't have a choice about it. Not if I want to obey my Father. Not if I want to do what I know is truly best for me. He is calling to you. He is calling to me. To take a minute and know that He is God. If I truly want to know Him today, I have to stop and rest. I have to let my hands down, and be still.

Brought to You by the Letter "C", and the Number "5".

Inspired from my friend's title the other day, I had to use it today for myself. My grocery list caught my eye the other day, when I realized everything on it began with the letter C. I mean, it was getting kind of weird, so I decided to add a couple other things. But before I did, this was what was on my list:

coffee
chicken
carrots
celery
cabbage
croutons
craisins
corn
cheese
cottage cheese (double c's...score!)

Is something wrong with my brain?

And, oh, my emotional 5 year old. It's not always like this, but if my daughter was 15, I'd think she was PMSing. This morning I thought I never hear the end of the drama.

First it was her eyes.

5 yr. old: Mommy, my eyes hurt.

me: Well, don't rub them, they'll just get worse.

5 yr old: They really hurt. (still rubbing)

me: Sweetie, you've got to stop rubbing them. It will only make them hurt more. You're being too rough on them. You have to be gentle with your eyes. They're very valuable to your body. (who know's why i said "valuable" but whatever)

5 yr old: WHY??? They can't break!! They can't fall out!!! (screaming through tears)

me: But by rubbing so hard, you're making them more sore. You're irritating them so much that they'll start to burn.

5 yr old: I CAN'T! (still screaming and crying) They really hurt!!! They're burning!!! They hurt so bad they feel like they're bleeding!!!

me: Ok. Well, we're at the park. Should we stay and play with your friends, or should we go home and do hot compresses?

5 yr old: Stay at the park. (stopping the rubbing and the crying) Ugghhh, I think I had an eyelash in them.

me: Uh huh. Probably so.

Then later the drama was over leaving the park.

5 yr old: Why do we have to leave the park?

me: Because it's time to go home and have lunch and take rests.

5 yr old: But why can't we stay longer? (starting with the high pitch whiny voice) They're staying longer! Why can't we??

me: Sweetie, you and your brother are very hungry and very tired, and it's time to go home and have lunch and naps.

5 yr old: I don't want to take a nap. That's boring!! I HATE THIS!! (she's been using this word lately like a curse word - very emphatically, and with so much emotion)

me: (looking at her with warning) Watch it.

5 yr old: (sobbing and screaming) I don't want to go home. I NEVER want to leave. I want to live at the park!!! I want to live at the park!!! This is the WORST day ever!!!

me: (thinking - seriously? Is this for real a conversation I'm having?) (speaking very calmly) We have a park right down the street from our house. We don't live that far from the park.

5 yr old: (enraged) NOT THAT PARK!!!! I want to live at THAT park!

me: Well, we couldn't really live at the park. (trying to bring reason into the conversation) Where would our beds be? And where would our food go? We have to live in a house, not the park.

5 yr old: (acting like I'm the one being irrational) MOMMY!!! I'm saying that we could LIVE in a HOUSE at that park. So that we wouldn't have to leave right now. You could just walk home and get lunch. Then we could stay LONGER!!

me: Ohhhh. Well, even if we lived at that park, we'd still go home for lunch and rests.

It went on a little bit longer. Not the yelling, but the crying. Oh, the tears. And I knew she just needed to let it out. But once we got home, I held her and rocked her while she cried for a while longer.

Thankfully, she is not this dramatic everyday. Some days, but not every day. I know that most of it is being too tired. Or just having a day where everything bothers her, and nothing goes right. And I feel like that sometimes, too. So, even though I was tempted to tell her to cut it out, and to not be so irrational, I want to be a mom who encourages her to be able to feel. Even when it's irrational. To let out her emotions in an appropriate setting, without hurting herself and others. I want to love her even when she's a basketcase. Because I know I'm loved like that by my Father. I know that He patiently listens to my crazy thoughts and feelings. He waits while I have my tantrums about whatever it is I'm going through. Then, He waits for me to run to Him. Then He holds me and tells me that He loves me. And He never tells me to shut up, and get it together. He lets me fall apart, and still be loved just as much.

My prayer is that one day, she'll run to His arms, not mine, and be filled with a love that's bigger than mine could ever be. Until that day, my arms and lap are ready and waiting.

Shoo Fly!

This past month, the kids and I have talked a lot about bugs. All different types, but I have kind of been partial to my favorites...caterpillars and ladybugs. Caterpillars, mainly because they turn into butterflies. And who doesn't like butterflies. And if you don't....what's wrong with you??? They don't hurt anyone, they don't bother you, they just fly around and look pretty. Same with ladybugs. Not to mention they're red and get to have polka dots. Definitely fun to see. Anyway, even though I've acted excited about finding bugs with the preschoolers, I am not a huge fan myself. But of course, I don't want my kids to be all scared about bugs, so I've been trying to keep my cool. I've checked out fun books like this one, to show how neat bugs are. We have bug catchers and songs, and so on and so forth. Well, I think the bugs are ganging up against me to show them my true colors.

The other day, my least favorite...a slug was on our morning paper. Keeping me from being able to even take it out of the bag and read it. And then, these weird pincher crawly bugs are in random places around our house. WHY???? I mean, I've never seen them before, and now, this spring they're like the mascot of our home. Then today, I was pulling down the driveway, and all of a sudden this wasp flew right in the front seat of our van. So, I'm all trying to quickly put it in park and jump out before I get stung, without wrecking in my own driveway, for fear of the wasp above my head. Not to mention that I've been blessed with my first mosquito bites of the season! I'm in bad shape if summer's not even begun, and I'm already dreading the bugs!!

Buy Coffee...Free Slaves.

A couple weeks ago, my hubby and I were blessed to be able to go hear about some horrendous facts and amazing deliverance stories about people enslaved. Not figuratively...Literally. You may remember when I posted about it here. You may not remember the number of slaves today...not 100 years ago...today. I'll remind you - over 27 million. I was and still am pretty blown away by what that we learned. The man that spoke was the executive of International Justice Ministry, which is a tremendous organization. If it makes you sad to think of children being in slave labor, or women being sold into prostitution, I would urge you to look into partnering with IJM.

However, whether or not you feel led to partner with IJM longterm, I bet you drink coffee...or know someone who does. In May only, Storyville Coffee is having a "Give It All Away in May" campaign, and they are giving all of their profit to International Justice Ministries. Not a tenth. Not a percentage....ALL of their profit this month alone will go to IJM. Maybe you could use it, or give it away, but this is the last week. Think about trying their coffee...and bringing freedom to the captives. But, hurry...there are only a couple days left in May!

Simply:

1. Go to www.storyville.com
2. Purchase coffee or home-brewing equipment.
3. 100% of your purchase price will be donated to IJM. Yes, every dollar of your purchase (including shipping) will be donated to IJM.

"In Every Person, There is A Family."

We just returned from a great trip to see many wonderful people...some family, some friends, but all loved ones. This morning, while chatting over coffee, with one of these beautiful people, she was talking about how every morning she goes to get her coffee from a little farm store. She greets the employees by name, and even sometimes gets to listen in on their lives. We shared how much we love being a part of others lives, and then she simply said, "you know, in every person, there is a family." And in such a small statement, I felt like she had summed up what I love about knowing people.

Returning from seeing so many in our own family, old and young, and then seeing or meeting other people in other families, I couldn't be more inspired to continue being amazed at how God has made each one of us completely unique. Made to know Him, and made to know one another. We are all such gifts to each other. It makes me sad when silly things get in the way of seeing that. Things like, being too busy, or having too much drama, or being too hung up on all things that aren't right about the person or situation. I like being able to just be. And enjoy the "family" in each one of us.

So hopefully, coming back, I'll be able to enter into this summer a little more restful. Having seen much, and loved many, and hoping to continue on in that journey.

For the Love of the Game...or Hunt

There are lots of things that I love about going to yard sales. The hustle and bustle of the no-nonsense early birds. The sleepy eyed 'good morning' that you get from the hosts. The wheelin and dealin to get the right price. The finds...oh, the finds that you can find. But I think my favorite thing is the way that I always feel like God reminds me that He knows what I need, down to the simplest of things. Sometimes I feel like He's been eavesdropping on my thoughts, and knows exactly what I was just thinking I needed. And then I remember, oh yeah, He already knows all of them!

Yesterday, I was separating an egg in my fingers for a cake that I was baking, and I thought to myself, I really need to get an egg separator. And I still use my mom's old cheese grater that really should be only kept as an antique because of all the rust on it. But I just never think of getting a cheese grater. Well, I found both of these handy gadgets today at a cute little Chinese woman's yard sale for the grand price of a $1 (for both).

We have all these mis-matched glasses, from different sets, that I love using, but we keep loosing them. My son happens to knock them off the table, or maybe I clank one too hard in the dishwasher, you know the deal. So, we've been down to just a couple, which gets kind of hard when you want to throw a dinner party. I haven't really thought of it much, but then this morning I found a whole set of the glass bubble tumblers, which I love! For $3. Yeah, new glasses!

Having people over is one of my favorite things to do...especially for special occasions or holidays. I went to one yard sale today, and I saw all of these beautiful silver plated antique serving dishes. I knew they would probably be asking a lot, because they're worth a lot. I remember seeing similar pieces on my grandmothers table for holiday dinners and always thinking it looked so fancy. I didn't see any prices on the pieces, so I simply asked the older lady what she was asking for them. She got excited just to talk with me about the pieces, especially when another little blue-haired lady walked up, and said, "Oh, that takes me back." I went to the car and got my checkbook and paid a big $20 for the five piece beautiful set. I can't wait for Christmas.

Speaking of Christmas, I've always loved those old vintage ornaments that are the gorgeous handmade glass of all different shapes and sizes, and all different colors. I was at one sale today, where a WHOLE BAG of them were in the "free pile". I even said, "Are you serious?"

My husband doesn't really get to play disc golf often. Ok, pretty much not at all. But the other day, he was getting the urge to go with all this nice weather we've been having. We happened upon a whole stack of discs for a $1. Now, at least he can play without worrying about losing his only one. Not that he would. haha.

On the way home, after all our shopping, my kids were happily playing with all their "new" toys -some of which were just freebies because of how cute and sweet they are...ummm...or maybe because it was almost 12 and people were getting ready to give the rest to good will - either way, they got loaded up with some fun things. My daughter said, "I love yard sales! You get new toys, and people give you stuff!" It was music to my ears.

*sorry for the lack of pictures...our camera was stolen, so for a while you'll just have to invision all the lovliness! ;)

Bittersweet Celebration

As I sit here and type, I know that I'm taking a risk. I'm risking that I may not be able to take a shower in a minute, if the little ones wake up early. This is really my one break in the day, and I should be spending it taking care of myself, right? Well, right now, taking care of myself, is sitting down and typing for a bit.

On Sunday, I had a fabulous Mother's Day. I was able to unwrap (literally) gifts of blessings in my life. I was surprised by flowers picked by my beautiful daughter, hugs and kisses galore by my sweet son, a latte made and brought to me in bed by my handsome husband, and then...my actual gift. My brand new red Kitchen Aid stand mixer. Y'all...I cannot tell you how long I've wanted one. But I can tell you how long I used that stupid piece of crap hand mixer - 10 years!!! I guess it wasn't that big of a piece of crap if I used it for that long, but you know what I mean. It was $10, and it started smelling like the motor about 3 seconds after I had it on. So, anyway, you can imagine how excited I was about my gift.

The day went on, and I realized how much I love sharing life. Sharing life with my family. Sharing life with my friends. Sharing life with the Body of Christ. And then, I started to miss her. You know, the one who the day was really all about to begin with. I started to remember how much I loved sharing life with my mama. And how much she would love seeing me as a Mama. Giving her kisses. Using her petnames and phrases. Laughing her laugh. Making her recipes for my children, the same way she did for me. Even using a Kitchen Aid mixer, just like she did. And I just wish that I could pick up the phone and call her. Or see her smile one more time.

It's a bittersweet time for another reason, too. My sister's late husband would have turned 36 yesterday. THIRTY-SIX!!! At his funeral three years ago, one of the songs we sang was "Give Me Jesus". If you know the song, you know the chorus says, "You can have all this world, but give me Jesus." I have to tell you, there have been times that I have wondered if I truly believe that statement. It's easy to sing it when you have everything that you want and need. But, standing in the little white church, with tears rolling down her face, and three small boys all around her, I remember her singing, "You can have all this world, but give me Jesus." I also know that there have been times since that my sister has said, "No, you know, Lord, honestly, I'd rather have my husband. This is just too hard."

In our feeble understanding, we cannot fathom how great the next page of life is. We cannot begin to see how full of a life our loved ones who have gone on before us are truly living. I know in my head how wonderful heaven must be, but what is here is so much easier to be attached to.

So today, in honor of my brother in law, we will go pick strawberries. My sister always made him strawberry shortcake for his birthday, so it's become a tradition for us to go together now. To think of him, and to enjoy strawberry shortcake for him, even though I know the food he and our mom enjoys now is far superior to anything here. We will pick, and we will smile. We will eat, and we will cry. Because that's what this life is about. Being able to still enjoy the celebration, even when it's a bittersweet celebration.

Hair Today, Gone Tomorrow

Over the last couple weeks I've seen or heard horror stories of girls River's age cutting their hair. I've been so glad that I haven't had to deal with this incident myself, knowing how much I love my little girls long blonde hair. Even though I just got mine chopped, thanks to your good advice, I really love her long locks.

This morning I was excited to go to the Farmers Market for yummy goodies and fresh flowers. So, after an episode of Dora, I told River to go brush her hair to get ready to go. She was only in there about a minute, when I hear...

"Mommy, HELP!!!"

She walked out of the bathroom with a COMB - not a brush like I had asked - tangled and wound tightly all around and stuck in her hair. It was wadded up in a MASS. Finally after I asked several times in a mad voice how this had happened, she confessed that she had wrapped and wound and twisted several times around her hair to use similar to a curling iron. Only without having brushed it yet from bedtime. It was only a couple inches away from her scalp.

Well, Mommy could not help. Her patience were too rattled, and she only ended up pulling and hurting. So Mommy went to the Farmer's Market. Daddy tried to help, with excessive globs of conditioner and two hours of soaking. But still, no progress, even after Daddy broke the comb out of her hair.

Did I mention that we were supposed to be at a Mother Daughter tea party in a few hours...that we were hosting a table at?

I called my salon in a panic. They were booked. I called Great Clips, but then decided not to go that route this time. I called a cute salon for girls that I had seen many times in passing, but never gave much thought. The girl mentioned the situation to the owner, and the owner said, "Bring her in!" Meanwhile, I'm thinking, "Great, Happy Mother's Day to me!!" You know, making it all about me. And comforting my little girl who was clearly not as concerned as her Mommy was about all this.

After the stylist spent another hour of tearing and pulling and breaking combs, we decided to make the call.

This is what she cut out of her hair.

Need a closer look?

I mean, ARE YOU KIDDING ME???? The stylist said she had seen some bad tangles in her day, but nothing ever this bad. Great, that's what you want to hear.

So, after about another hour, and lots of clipping and curling...this is what we had.

River is excited to have short (and for the moment, curly) hair like Mommy's. Mommy knows that her long locks will grow back. And thinks that her little girl is completely gorgeous no matter how short her hair is.

And by tonight, we looked like this.

Storm Watching

Rain

The rain is raining all around,

It falls on field and tree,

It rains on the umbrellas here,

And on the ships at sea.

~Robert Louis Stevenson

Last night I awoke to loud claps of thunder and I knew despite my prayers for a sunny day today that we would have our share of rain today.   We have our end of year party this afternoon, and this year we decided to do something different.  Instead of having an inside pizza party, we decided to do an outside cookout - it's gonna be awesome...if this rain would go away.   And as much as I think of the rain as my struggle today, there are much bigger storms that I want to stand against.

I was watching some news last night, something I don't do very often.   And a man that was a tornado survivor said something about the storm that resounded with me.   He spoke of how the tornado didn't care if the people were rich or poor, mayor or beggar.    At the end of the storm, they were all left the same - houses ruined, land torn to pieces, stores destroyed, livestock killed.     Left with nothing.   They all had to start from scratch, and they all had to come together, to decide to rebuild their town.    Even though it was a task bigger than they could imagine, today they have a rebuilt city, that is more beautiful than anything they had before.

Sunday we were able to go to a service that was about slavery still existing today.    How over 27 million people are in bondage to slavery today - not 100 years ago - TODAY.    92% being women and children - and 50% being children.   Women like me...children like mine.    We learned horrendous truths about people being tricked into slavery and amazing stories of slaves being rescued out of bondage.     

The question that begins to be overwhelming is "what can I do about it?"    And the truth is, is that alone, we can not do very much.    But standing together, with Christ, we would be able to.    The church has got to find a way to come together, and stand against the injustices in this world.   We can no longer sit by and say, well, that happens, and it's awful, but there's nothing we can do about it.    

I love how Isaiah reminds us of this...

"The Lord has sent us to bind up the brokenhearted, to proclaim freedom for the captives, and release from darkness for the prisoners, and to comfort all who mourn."   Isa. 61:1-2

And this in Micah...

He has told you, O man, what is good; And what does the LORD require of you But to do justice, to love kindness, And to walk humbly with your God?

It is not an option of whether it is our call or not.   The Lord has clearly said, this is what I want!  This is what I require.    So, today I would challenge you to pray for those in bondage - whether they are high school girls in your own town, or children across the globe intrenched in evil against their will, would you join with me to be a part of this storm.   Would you offer up what you have to the Lord, and ask Him, to do something about this so present darkness?  About this dreadful storm.

In Lieu of National Poetry Month

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Little Joys

This morning, no, change that...Last night, I started thinking about what I could write about today for "Tuesdays Unwrapped".   I knew that nothing was popping out at me, and I wasn't having all those little revelations that sometimes just seem to come so naturally.    And we can't find our camera battery, which means no great pictures of what I've captured.  

Instead, I had this:

A messy house, and the feeling of no matter what I will do, it will never all be together.  A cold that won't go away.   Fussy kids.  A busy and messy schedule - too much to do in too little time to do it.   No toilet paper - yes, you heard that right, and no it's not the first time that has happened.

But I did have these little faces to keep me company.    (this pic is actually from Christmas - I need new ones!)

And this sweetie to give me a hug.    

The kids and I had a lovely little lunch on the back deck.    Where big sister kept telling little brother to leave her birdhouse alone.   This is how she explained herself... "Birds of three, let it be!"   Oh, the little joys.

Tell Me A Story

I need a little change here. I've grown tired of my railroad tracks, as much as I love them. When I was a little girl, and I was tired or maybe just a little bit bored, I would say to my Mom or Dad, "Tell me a story about when you were little." I loved hearing their tales of what their lives used to be like. There was something about knowing a piece of them that I could never really see, but through their stories, could know more who they were. They became more alive. More real. More enjoyable.

There's something about the beach that calls me home. I love that when I'm there I think about things like building sand castles with my family when I was a little girl. Or my sister, cousins, and I all pretending like we're wild horses galloping down the shore. Going body surfing with my Dad. Floating out on rafts into the deep, dark water, with my dad, uncles and grandfather, and then being scared as one of them would grab at our legs from underwater. Or countless memories of looking for shells with my Mama. She would find one, pick it up, call it by name (like, "What a pretty Ladie's Slipper!), and then put it in her hand like it was gold that she had just found. I love seeing my kids play in the freezing cold water just like I used to do, and come out blue lips and all ready to rush in and take a warm bath. It's great.

So join me in coming home for a bit. Think of your favorite places. Remember your fondest memories of where you most feel at home. I'd love to hear a story or two.

Unveiled Glory

My friend has this great idea...and I'm so glad that I finally got around to participating!  I love that we can share our stories of everyday grandeur!  

Yesterday (Tuesday) I found myself praying for my children a prayer that I often pray.  I don't start out thinking to pray this exact prayer, but what many times ends up being my prayer is that they would see God's glory and that because of seeing His glory, they would never turn away.   Then, this morning I sat in my favorite morning spot, drank a few sips of good coffee, watched the birds, and read for a brief moment before my two precious kids ran in to give me sweet good morning hugs and kisses.  

"Now the Lord is that Spirit: and where the Spirit of the Lord is, there is freedom. But we all, with open face beholding as in a glass the glory of the Lord, are changed into the same image from glory to glory, even as by the Spirit of the Lord." (2 Cor. 3:18)

As the words entered my heart I thought about the crazy way God does things.    If I were God, I would say that the way you get glory is by doing great things.   Or by accomplishing great works.  But instead of doing, He simply says, look at me.  God.    Turn your eyes to me, and believe in my greatness, and you will be changed from glory to glory.    How amazing it is that He changes us from glory to glory, as we look upon Him.   That He doesn't say, bring a veil with you and cover your eyes.   That He says, look upon me, and have freedom!   Look upon me, and go from glory to glory!

Most days, my "glory" probably goes unnoticed even to me.   I don't realize that I'm getting more patient, or that He's making me more like Him.    Or that I screwed up everything, and had a great fall-on-my-face-so-You-can-remind-me-I-can't-do-it-alone day.   But as I fold the laundry or make a casserole, as I love my little ones and encourage their souls to seek after Him, I truly believe by faith, He is doing that work.  Even in yucky old me!   And you - it's pretty amazing.   To think that our acts of our own accord are filthy rags, but as we look to Him, we are changed from glory to glory, 'even as by the Spirit of the Lord'.

I'm glad that it's as true for me as it is for my sweet little ones.  That as they look to the Lord, as they see His glory, they will be changed from glory to glory.    

More After Shots...

We really had a great time at the beach. When we finally got home and all unpacked, we decided to take a couple after shots.

Before and After...Bathroom

For a while we've been enjoying our newly redone bathroom, but I've yet to show the before and after pics.   While relaxing down here at the beach, I was reading an article in one of my Real Simples that I hadn't had a chance to look at until being down here, and it was showing some beautiful shades of green.   It made me remember about my bathroom, and how calming it now is.   

Even though I love decorating, I'm not someone who knows from the start exactly what things are going to look like.   Usually, I decide as I'm in the process.    For my bathroom, I was almost sure that I was going to paint it a serene shade of blue.    I came home with a great shade of green instead.   My husband said, "I thought you were going with a blue of some sort."   I responded, "I did, too."    But, I love the shade I picked.   It's completely tranquil.     The name of it is "Pebble" from Valspar.

We knew we had to redo the bathroom - it wasn't really an option.   It's our only bathroom, and there just wasn't a lot of room.   The vanity took up most of the floor space, so we knew that a pedestal sink would be nice.    There was old linoleum, and we wanted tile.   But we also knew that we couldn't splurge and completely redo everything.    So, the things we chose were a new sink, beadboard to make it feel bigger and give it more character, new floor, and new light fixtures. 

this is my only before picture with the old sink/vanity still in.     River had "decorated" it for Christmas (thus the napkins everywhere and the original reason for the picture.)

sink out,  subfloor exposed

new fixture with same old mirror and medicine cabinet, but a frame made to fit around the mirror to give it a little more class.

i think this shot shows the truest representation of the color "pebble"

It's great.   Still simple, but also serene.    I love being in there now, verses how much I used to dread going in.   Much less...having to let guests use it!    To see more pics of the process, check out my hubby's handiwork here.   And if you ever think a redoing a small bathroom won't really make a difference, you better think again!

SPRING BREAK, 09!

Before I ever had my children, I already had fallen head over heels in love with these three beautiful boys.   I know they would hate me even saying that, but AREN'T they gorgeous?

They are such a blessing to our family, and we love being with them.   My kids call them "brother cousins" and cute things like that.   And I get to be the fun aunt, otherwise known as, "Aunt Mama".   Even though we live in the same city, we don't get time together like I wish we had.    Since my sis is in the midst of clinicals and rotations and other nursing school things that I can't comprehend, we had asked if we could steal them away for their spring break to join us down at the beach.    So, thus, the Spring Break, 09.

We decided that we would leave last night after we all had Easter dinner together.    So, last night on the way down, we walked into McDonald's at 10pm for a snack and bathroom break.  We all went in.   It was really fun to pretend for a few minutes like I was this cool fun mom of 5 beautiful sandy blonde's and was all cute in my sundress from Easter, and had my cute husband smiling at me, and wasn't even concerned about the hour.    Everyone had those looks like...well, how you would look if you saw somebody walk into a place with 5 kids under the age of 10.    It was great.

We got back in the car, and after fighting severely with the stupid seat belts of the too crammed car seats, I shouted out, "We're not getting out until we get to the beach!"   Not even 5 minutes later, my daughter says, "Mommy, I have to go again....REALLY BAD!"     She had been so excited about her new water bottle with cold water, she had drunk all of it.    In less than an hour.    Me, not being quite so cool anymore, looked over at my hubby, who was just smiling. 

One day, when I was a little girl, probably 9, and was driving my mom crazy on a cross country trip, she turned around, and shouted..."MELISSA, I HOPE YOU HAVE 5 KIDS!!!"    I, being the super sensitive and over dramatic child I was, burst into tears.    My sister all the while quietly chuckling at my expense.   

So we're enjoying our beach time, and loving every minute of having 5 kids...for a week.

A Mother's Lot

Yesterday, Asher and I were enjoying a little bit of one on one time.   He asked to play ball together, which we don't do as often as we should.   Coming off such a great Tarheel victory, I couldn't wait to encourage his ball ability.   We pulled the goal out and as I did, he asked me to make the goal higher.   It had already been raised a little the other day, and so I asked if he was sure.   He was.

We started shooting, him with the hard, small size appropriate basketball.   Not the Nerf kind.  Not the squishy, soft kind.   That's the kind he gave me.   After shooting several times and missing, me being the supportive mother, asked if he wanted me to lower the goal.   He said no.   I asked him if he wanted me to lift him up to make it in.   He said no again.   Or, "uhhh-ohh", which means no.

He continued throwing the ball up, determined to make one in.    But one after the other, they missed.    He started throwing harder, and bending down lower trying to get more leverage.    Nothing.   Finally, he shot one that hit the rim, but was thrown so hard it shot right back down at him, and slammed into his face.    Hard.    

He cried for a few minutes, and as I saw the big red mark on his face, I kissed it and asked if he wanted to stop playing.    He said no.   And then proceeded to get in position again.    Bending low, and having the ball held as rightly as he knew how, he shot it up as hard as he could.  I held my breath, just hoping that this time it would make it in....

It went in.

I marveled at his persistence while wondering if this is what mothers go through.  Do they stand aside, and without helping, allow their children to try their hardest and fail.   Time and time again.   Do they encourage after every attempt, even when the outcome is not success as we would call success.    Do they love on them when they lose, and when they win?    Do they see them get hurt and struggle, only to feel let down one more time?    The answer?   Yes.   Yes, we do.   Because without the struggle there would be no victory.    And without the disappointment, there would be no character built.   Without the pain, there would be no triumph.

I can't help but think of Mary this week.    How she was able to see her sweet Son, who had grown into an amazing man, have to face a trial none of us can imagine.   To be betrayed by the closest of friends.   To be accused unjustly.   To be beaten almost to the point of death, only to have to endure more torture.    To be made sin, when He knew no sin.    To suffer like no one ever has nor ever will.   To feel the grip of death, and to even be given over to it.    To be forsaken by everyone, even His Father.   

The pain that she must have known in those moments is a pain that I do not wish to share.   It is a suffering that I would never ask to have.    But then, I think about how she got to be Jesus' mother.   How she got to see Him live a Holy life.   She was able to help shape Him into a man.    She saw Him do miracles and display God's glory day after day after day.   She saw Him defeat death.    Defeat sin.   Defeat all His enemies, once and for all.    Destroy any grip that death would ever hold on any of us ever again.   And as painful as it must have been, I can't begin to understand the pride she must have had when He rose up from the grave.   That after every bit of pain and suffering, He had relief.   He had healing.    He had victory.

"Let us also lay aside every encumbrance and the sin which so easily entangles us, and let us run with endurance the race that is set before us, fixing our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of faith, who for the joy set before Him endured the cross, despising the shame, and has sat down at the right hand of the throne of God.  For consider Him who has endured such hostility by sinners against Himself, so that you will not grow weary and lose heart."   Heb. 12:1-3

Open Season

It's officially open season for yard sales. I know, I know...you're on the edge of your seat!

My friend Diane and I have always loved yard sales. We absolutely love getting the deal of our lives every Saturday morning. We'll tell each other about yard sales that we heard about or have gone to, and even sometimes run into each other unintentionally at them. This morning we had fun going together on the hunt. Years ago we used to talk about how we could open up a little store with all of our yard sale finds and call it "Junk in the Trunk". Here's why...

After one hour and about $15 later here's what the car looked like.

And here is what we looked like.

For $5 I got all of this.

(random mix, I know)

Here are my favs from the day (especially when they were .50 cents each!)

To see my yard sale philosophy and to check out other fun tips to get you ready for yard sale season check this post out! I'd love to hear your favorite yard sale tales! If you can't tell, it's one of my favorite subjects!

Caught in the Middle

I love our Friday mornings.    It's the only day we don't have to rush out the door to be somewhere, and it's great.    SOOOO great.   The kids watch cartoons, and I...well, I check in on blogs and think about meaningless decisions.    Such as...

Short or long???

I always get to this place when my hair is in between and I get so sick of it.   It doesn't look good down, because if it's gonna be long, I need to get it shaped up.   And it usually is up in a pony tail, but nothing too cute.   It just feels so blah and nothing.   I need to make A CHANGE!  

I always love my short cuts, and it's been a long time since it's been really short (like pregnant with Asher).    But whenever it's short I always miss it being long.   I feel like I might be missing out on having curly hair by not making the most of it.    (Can you see how I'm crazy?)   

But usually what I do is get it cut pretty short, and then take a long time to let it grow all the way out, and then I get so sick of it that I cut it again.     It feels cuter when it's short, but I like the variety of a long cut.

Ok, so to help me in my indecisiveness, I'm asking for your opinion...

short 

(see, told you i was pregnant- 4 months to be exact)

long

Now, don't give me all those wishy-washy "you could go either way" answers.   I know I could, but I don't know WHICH way!   That's why I need your help!

I'm sure I'll talk about more meaningful things soon!

Turns Out I Don't Like Exercise...

A few years ago, I decided I was going to try to be more active.     Especially since 30 was right around the corner, I felt like, I needed to implement some sort of routine that would help me to stay somewhat in shape and healthy.     So, I decided I would start running on a regular basis.   As much as I tried to pump myself up for this, I knew that I really did not like running.   Much less, running alone.   And so I went a few times, about once a week or so for about a month.   Nothing too major.   But, as I later explained to my sister and brother in law, I found something new out about myself.    And, as I said to them, "Turns out, I don't really like exercise."    We all started laughing, and it turned into a famous inside joke.

So, now, three years later, I still don't like exercising.   I've never been one of those girls that just loves getting out and going for a run.    And as much as I wish I was, I'm not.   I love dancing.   I love swimming.     I love going for walks.    But, I really don't like going and "working out".  

So, the only way I've found to get over this hump, has showed me more about me, than I would have ever guessed.  I go to an aerobics class every Wed. morning. before the kids are up and the hubby is out the door.   My friend and I usually go together, so she texts me the night before to see who's going to drive.   (That means I can't get out of it)   And my instructor is my pastor's wife who is hilarious and fun to be around, and always checks to see if I'm coming, or calls when I miss.     So, the things I need in life have all been made clear to me through this - relationship and accountability.   It's the answer to my exercise problem.     Also, it's a great all encompassing workout with weights, abs, and cardiac, all in an hour.   So it's great for me - not too long on any one thing, very efficient.

If you're someone who can do it alone, and longs for that time by yourself...Man! I wish I were like you!   But those of you who are more like me, and need others encouragement and support, I'm here to say, it can be done...even if it's just once a week.   Like my friend reminded me this morning, "You're really lifting weights all day long".   As my little boy is on my lap, I couldn't agree more.   I still don't wake up thinking how glad I am that it's Wed. and I can go to aerobics.  But I'm always glad afterwards for the good workout that I've had.

What are your secrets for exercise success?